Suicide Is the 11^th leading cause of death in the United States. Everyday on average there are 130 suicides every day with someone dying every 11.5 minutes.

The impact of suicide on the family and friends that are left behind can be significant as losing a loved one to suicide can be a shocking and traumatic event. Friends and families will face overwhelmingly deep and complex emotions. These individuals need understanding and support if they are to heal from this terrible event.

Understanding Grief and Bereavement

Grieving after a loss, especially to suicide, is profoundly personal. It is important to understand the basic concepts of grief, grief counseling and bereavement support to help loved ones deal with these emotions.

What Is Grief

Grief is our natural reaction to losing something or someone important to us. This loss causes sadness, anger, and disbelief. These feelings can be a lot to manage and can impact our health physically, mentally, and emotionally. Understanding the stages of grief can help us make sense of our mourning.

Phases of Bereavement

Bereavement, the process of grieving and coping with the loss of a loved one, generally involves several phases. These phases are not strictly linear and can vary significantly from person to person. The commonly recognized phases of bereavement include:

Shock and Denial

• Shock: Initially, the bereaved person may feel numb or in disbelief. This phase is often characterized by an inability to accept the reality of the loss.
• Denial: Some people may deny the loss or the implications of it, which serves as a defense mechanism to protect themselves from immediate pain.

Pain and Guilt

• Pain: As the shock wears off, intense emotional pain sets in. This can be overwhelming and may be accompanied by physical symptoms such as fatigue, nausea, and difficulty breathing.
• Guilt: The bereaved may feel guilty about things said or unsaid, or about not being able to prevent the loss. They might also experience “survivor’s guilt” if they have survived a situation that the deceased did not.

Anger and Bargaining

• Anger: Frustration and helplessness can lead to anger. This anger may be directed towards themselves, others, or even the deceased.
• Bargaining: The bereaved may dwell on “what if” scenarios, trying to negotiate or make bargains (often with a higher power) to reverse or mitigate the loss.

Depression, Reflection, and Loneliness

• Depression: Deep sadness and despair set in as the bereaved begin to fully realize the magnitude of the loss.
• Reflection: This phase involves reflecting on memories and experiences with the deceased, which can be both painful and comforting.
• Loneliness: The absence of a loved one becomes more apparent, leading to feelings of loneliness and isolation.

The Upward Turn: Gradually, the bereaved starts to adjust to life without their loved one. Emotions become more stable, and the intense pain begins to lessen.

Reconstruction and Working Through: The bereaved begins to find ways to move forward. They start to develop new routines and establish new patterns in their lives. They may also begin to seek solutions to practical problems that arose from the loss.

Acceptance and Hope

• Acceptance: The bereaved accepts the reality of the loss and learns to live with it. This doesn’t mean that they forget the deceased, but they find a way to carry on with life.
• Hope: There is a gradual return of hope and the ability to look forward to the future. Positive memories of the deceased can be cherished without intense pain.

These phases, outlined by various models of grief (such as the Kübler-Ross model), serve as a framework for understanding the complex emotions and processes involved in bereavement. However, it’s important to recognize that grief is highly individual, and people may experience these phases in different orders, revisit previous phases, or skip some phases altogether.

Unique Aspects of Suicide Loss Grief

Losing someone to suicide has its unique hurdles. It often brings feelings like guilt and shame. There are many unanswered questions. It’s important for those affected to get specific grief counseling. Support from suicide prevention experts and groups is crucial. They offer the help and understanding needed during this extremely difficult time.

Navigating Grief and Finding Healing

The grieving process following suicide frequently involves complex emotions such as guilt, anger, and profound sadness. For those left behind, navigating this grief is rarely straightforward. It extends from the initial shock to the long-term journey of healing. The experience of loss through suicide is a lifelong process, with the needs of survivors evolving over time.

Fostering Emotional Healing

Healing isn’t just a matter of time. It takes work to deal with sadness, guilt, and anger. Approaches like CBT and talking in support groups can help. These methods aid in understanding your feelings and finding ways to cope.

• Take the lead in supporting them; don’t wait for them to ask.
• The time just after a suicide loss can be hard on the person grieving.
• Be patient, compassionate, and ready to meet each person’s unique needs.

Professional Support: Grief Counseling and Mental Health Resources

It’s important to obtain professional help to guide you through the emotional process of suicide grief. Grief counseling brings structured ways to heal. It lets you know how to get mental health support, which makes a major difference.

Support groups and therapy help lower the risk of more suicides. They also aid in dealing with the loss. Writing therapy, like keeping a journal or writing letters, is good for coping with the feelings experienced after a loved one commits suicide.

Grief counseling can offer numerous benefits for individuals coping with the loss of a loved one. Some of the key benefits include:

Emotional Support:

• Grief counselors provide a safe and supportive environment where individuals can express their emotions without judgment. This emotional support can help reduce feelings of isolation and loneliness.

Validation of Feelings:

• Counselors validate the wide range of emotions experienced during grief, helping individuals understand that their feelings are normal and part of the grieving process.

Coping Strategies:

• Grief counselors teach practical coping strategies and techniques to manage grief, such as relaxation exercises, journaling, and mindfulness practices. These tools can help individuals navigate their emotions more effectively.

Understanding the Grieving Process:

• Counseling can provide insight into the stages and phases of grief, helping individuals understand what they are experiencing and what to expect. This understanding can reduce anxiety and uncertainty about the grieving process.

Improved Mental Health:

• Grief counseling can help prevent or alleviate symptoms of depression, anxiety, and other mental health issues that may arise from unresolved grief. Early intervention can promote better long-term mental health outcomes.

Facilitating Acceptance:

• Counselors assist individuals in coming to terms with their loss, facilitating the process of acceptance. This can help individuals integrate the loss into their lives and move forward.

Creating a New Normal:

• Counselors assist individuals in finding ways to rebuild their lives and establish a “new normal” after the loss. This might involve setting new goals, finding new interests, or rediscovering a sense of purpose.

Preventing Complicated Grief:

• For those at risk of complicated or prolonged grief, counseling can provide early intervention to address and mitigate these risks, promoting healthier grieving.

Finding the Right Counselor

Picking the best counselor is crucial for real recovery. Look for their education, skills, and if you feel you can open up to them. The American Psychological Association suggests finding grief counselors with the right licenses and suicide prevention know-how. Asking friends or local mental health groups for suggestions can also help you choose well.

Resources and Helplines

Along with one-on-one counseling, there are helpful resources and hotlines for those affected by suicide loss. These groups are ready to help 24/7, offering support and advice at any time. Important aids include:

•       The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline – It’s key for private talks with those needing help.

•       The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention – Gives out guides and support to survivors.

•       GriefShare – A network aiding those dealing with loss.

In closing grieving after the suicide of a loved one is a challenging and intricate process. Providing a supportive and compassionate response is crucial in aiding those left behind. It is essential to understand the unique nature of grief associated with suicide, encourage open discussions about emotions, and promote healthy coping mechanisms. With empathy and comprehension, individuals can embark on the journey towards healing and peace.